Dad Jokes

A celebration of the delightfully-terrible Dad Joke! These may not be great jokes but every time you share a good bad joke with your kids you are making a great moment. Did any of these make you and your kids laugh? Submit a new Joke or share with us and other dads on Twitter and Facebook @FatherhoodGov, and use #DadJokesRule! Para chistes en español

Why did the clock get in trouble at school?
Because he "tocked" a lot.

Would you like to hear a pizza joke?
Never mind. It's too cheesy.

What did the football coach say to the vending machine?
I need a quarter back.

What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad.

Why are movie stars so cool?
Because they have so many fans.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin says, "It's hot in here." The second muffin screams, "Ahhh! A talking muffin."

Why did the cat run away from the tree?
Because of its bark.

Why did the cat get kicked out of the computer store?
He kept playing with the mouse.

Why do you have to be careful when it's raining cats and dogs?
Because you might step in a poodle.

What snake never skips dessert?
A pie-thon.